Here’s a thought I often have (that you might find interesting) . . .
Way back in the mid-late 80’s I got my first confrontation with the ‘modern female’: feminism, and all that crap. I was appalled. A bunch of girls telling me I’m violating their rights, accusing me of absurd things, and the endless belittling of femininity.
Naturally, this baffled me.
As I observed this I began to notice patterns in their behaviour and statements. I could see that there was more to it than meets the eye (and what everyone thought).
I traced a lot of this to menstruation, though that may sound funny. It is a subject, as I found out, which was taboo to talk about with both male and female. But, yet, it seemed to cast a dark shadow over everything. This forced me to make an inquiry about it.
My discovery of menstruation is quite interesting. I never found out what menstruation was, really, till I was in my early 20’s probably. I heard of it but I never really knew what it was.
But, because of all the crap of the ‘modern female’ I always had this curious suspicion around them. I’d watch them and wonder what the crap was going on and why they were making all these ridiculous claims. After months of observations I began to say something to this effect:
“They always act like they’re going to be hurt in some way, as if it’s imminent, about to happen. They seem helpless to this, as if they can do nothing about it. There’s something . . . a fear . . . a terror . . . that overwhelms them. Some girls can’t seem to handle this. They seem to want to escape it, flee it. It’s like they are looking out into this big dark black hole, scared of what might be in there. Some girls go through great lengths to deal with this crisis from denial to blaming it on the world. ”
For months I observed this ‘condition in the female’ and was bewildered. What could cause such terror and fear? Everywhere I turned I saw examples of this. But yet there was nothing comparable to this in the male that I could see. For the female it seemed constant. Some girls were worst than others. It mystified the crap out of me.
Then, one day, in my political science class I think, I overheard a conversation. A female and a guy were talking and she mentioned menstruation and how it made her uptight and all that. It wasn’t what she said but the tone of her voice that caught my attention. It sounded very familiar. I began to realize that this was the same passion that I was observing.
This may not sound like much but what is important about this is that I did not know what it was I was observing, so I had no bias or preconceived notions about it. I found that bias and preconceived notions distorted everyone else’s viewpoint about it, even the females. Like I said, it was a taboo subject. I, on the other hand, was only describing what I was seeing, and saw it from a different angle devoid of any of this.
In its simplist form (as it’s actually very complicated), I described it this way:
There is the instinctual need for childbearing within the female. This passion, really, motivates and colors practically everything a female does (that’s proven more true the older I get too). This childbearing passion has a pattern and a character. That is, it has patterns of manifestations and deep inner themes that are commonly seen within all females. I put it into words this way, speaking as if it was some sort of story: “when the female comes of age the ‘great lady of childbearing’ comes upon her. She has many faces. On one extreme is the lady who is young, pretty, and fertile and happy like spring. The other extreme is old, ugly, barren, hard and difficult like winter. When the latter overcomes and dominates the female the dark side of this passion comes out. The old ugly hag comes and dominates her, controls her like a slave, making her do her every bid and whim. The female is powerless against her. She presses upon her emotions and feelings she can’t handle. Her life often becomes nothing but a struggle to flee from this old hag and escape her clutches. But she can’t escape. For some girls this crisis dominates their lives.”
This ‘old hag’ is really menstruation or the dark side of it. Or, to be more precise, it is really the dark side of child bearing. As I looked into customs and myths of the past all over the world I saw numerous portrayals of this crisis. Even some of our fairy tales portrayed similar stories with the witch enslaving a girl or imprisoning her. Oftentimes a male came and ‘saved’ her. This appears to be true too. What seems to save the females from the old hag is not really the male, really, but having a child. After all, that is what this passion – and conflict – is all about!
But, for some girls, they continue to struggle with it. They become, what I always call, the ‘old hags apprentice’. These are girls that persist in the ‘menstrual way’, seeing abuse, victimizing, and enslavement everywhere they turn. They also are continually trying to be free from it. In a way, it becomes a religion of sorts or a way of life.
It’s ironic that, though they seek to be free from it, their point of view and attitude keep it alive within them. This means they never escape its hold on them. But, occasionally, there are situations that make them think they are free from it. These happen from time to time and they seem to play a game with themselves, as if they will one day be free of the old hags control (Feminism seems to be one of these ‘times’ when they think they will be free from the old hags clutches).
The ‘old hags apprentice’ has many forms, from just a ‘bitch’ on one side to a feminist on the other. Initially, it took me a while to realize that feminism is just a version of this crisis but it makes sense now. It just happened that, one day, after watching feminists talk I noticed how similar they were to the ‘old hags apprentice’. In many ways, they fit the bill exactly, claiming the same things and their pattern of thought fit quite well. What makes the feminist different than the ‘bitch’ is that they seem to be making a way of life out of it. They also hide behind a lot of legal/political concepts making it sound ‘official’.
I should point out that there is a tendency to project their conflict on the world. It also colors their perception of the world and their interpretation of the events of life. This is one reason why their claims and viewpoints are so odd, unusual, and out-of-place. In reality, they are not complaining about an external event but a deep inner event that is affecting and influencing only them. This is why, when other people hear it, there is a sense of “what are you talking about?” It’s interesting that I can often tell how well a female feels about herself and her femininity by listening to how she feels about the world in general. As I said, this is because many girls project their ‘menstrual conflict’, so to speak, upon the world.
Watching this over the years has convinced me how powerful this crisis can be. In addition, their continual tendency to blame everything on the male or the world shows how they cannot relate with this conflict, even though it is innately femalish. In actuality, most females seemed removed from this passion and seem as distant from it as a lot of guys. But I found this is a subject you don’t talk to some girls about. Just to mention it and some girls explode. This is a good example of the force – and conflict – that hides behind this passion.
Some of the things claimed by the ‘old hags apprentice’ are:
– “I’m abused” or “I’m a victim” –There is always a sense they are being hurt in some way. I believe this originates from the fact that the females bodies are abused every month by menstruation. This feeling of abuse can get quite extensive and extreme. It often goes beyond their bodies to things like their emotions and sense of dignity. It can eat away at their self-esteem too. This may sound funny, but I think some girls feel ‘violated’ by menstruation, almost like their body is ‘raping’ them.
– “I’m a slave” – They feel controlled and manipulated by something. I believe this originated from the fact that a female is enslaved by her emotions every month. It leaves this sense of being a ‘puppet’ to something. They don’t have any control and power. This leaves a sense of helplessness in life for many girls. Some girls have a life long struggle with this.
– “It’s all the males’ fault” – I feel this shows that, behind all the crap, childbearing is still at the heart of this. The tendency to continually lay blame at the males feet has always shown me where a lot of this passion has origin – the male and childbearing. It’s not their rights or equality or whatever else they claim. That’s just the ‘front’ for this conflict.
– “We’re liberated” – Oftentimes, once they find someone or something to blame they will try to ‘free’ themselves from it (like that’s going to do anything). They do a lot of attempts and effort to try to free themselves from the old hag. In many ways, this is one of the most interesting things about them as they do all sorts of attempts to try to achieve ‘liberation’. No matter what they do they cannot free themselves so all this effort is wasted, really. This ‘doomed liberation’ is like a cat trying to convince themselves they’re a dog. Its one big illusion and part of the illusion of this whole conflict. It may seem to work for a while but it’s doomed to fail. One of the side effects of this thinking is that they end of being the ‘victimizers’ as they victimize the thing they blamed, which seldom did anything to them.
As I said above, the feminist tends to turn the ‘old hags apprentice’ into a way of life. One of the reasons for this, I believe, is the political/legal situation caused by ‘democracy’, ‘freedom’, and ‘rights’ that’s appeared these past few hundred years or so. It gave them a viable excuse to develop it and turn it into a way of life. Normally, it seems that the ‘old hags apprentice’ is just an individual female in which it has personal meaning to her. They usually don’t ‘preach a cause’ and there is seldom social meaning.
But it’s became clear that all this legal/political mumbo jumbo that they based their claims on is nothing but a ‘front’ for another motive. It didn’t take a genius to see that they were using the legal/political explanation because IT WORKED. During the cold war all you had to do is yell ‘rights’ and you got your way. Because it works they use it and project their ‘menstrual blood’, as I often jokingly said, all over the rest of us. I’ve always felt that if you were to take that point of view away you’d see a lot of this end.
I believe a lot of this conflict getting out of control has origin in the alienation and destruction of the female identity that has happened these past several hundred years. After observing the ‘female crisis’ for over 20 years I became convinced how critical and imperative it was for females to have a firm identity. The childbearing/menstrual passion is a strong and powerful force in the female life, more than male and female realize, I think. It’s pretty much constant too. A firm identity protects the female from its force and it also gives the passion a direction allowing it to be productive in life. One of the signs, to me, of a female identity crisis is that they complain of feeling ‘victimized’ by ‘something’. They feel a ‘victim’ because this passion is affecting them and there’s nothing they can do about it. It’s a ‘something’ because they feel only the passion of it but not what it is or what it means.
And so I can see that a lot of feminism really describes a ‘crisis of femininity’. Behind all its high legal and political jargon is a bunch of girls who lost sense of their femininity. And so it seems to me that feminism, then, is nothing but an attempt at deal with the ‘female crisis’ that exists nowadays. The problem is that its one big illusion that’s doomed to fail. I wish it’d hurry and fail because its doing a lot of damage. We will most likely have to wait for a new generation or era to arrive that has another explanation of the world that makes its point of view worthless.
I hope it starts tomorrow . . .