I had a dream about almost being arrested. I was somewhere on vacation, it seems, in another city. It seems that it was like Washington, D.C. I was with someone. While I was in my room, about to see the sights, two men came in and said that they had to talk to me. They were like the FBI or something. They said that I had some illegal things. I said I didn’t. It seems they took me somewhere and kept telling me I could be arrested. I kept telling them I had nothing illegal, at least as far as I knew. The guy who I was with finally told me that it was the guns I had. I did have some semi-automatic machine guns types but I had put them somewhere else (maybe a locker somewhere, I couldn’t remember). They searched my room and found a redish colored gun. I’m not sure what type of gun it was though. It looked like one of those large squirt guns that kids play with. I told them I had never shot that and had never used it. Thats really all I recall. During this whole thing I was frightened of being arrested for something I didn’t do.
This dream baffled me. I got a glimpse of the meaning while sitting next to a stream where I seemed perplexed. I could not think or seem to compose myself. My mind seemed disarrayed. While thinking about it I thought about a blog I had started, oddly enough, that day, about how I do not know what I’m talking about where I spoke of inspiration and ‘active knowing’ (called “On how I really don’t know what I’m talking about – the seeking of inspiration, ‘active knowing’, and character“). On thinking about this, I almost immediately knew that the FBI agents threatening me with arrest was really a reflection of how my ‘passive knowing’ was hampering me. I needed to ‘break through’ the ‘passive knowing’. This is because this type of thought is ‘passive’ and ‘dead’. This shows how ‘passive knowing’ can become like a rut a person gets into. Once one is in a certain pattern of thought one can’t get out. My thought had became ‘rigid’, lacking depth and meaning and devoid of life. This was where I was at. I was needing to break out of that rut and get back into ‘active knowing’ or inspiration. Over the winter I seemed to slip into that rut. I’m still trying to get out. The FBI agents represent that part of myself trying to get out of the ‘rut’, as if asking myself where the thoughts are. The guns represent the ‘thoughts’ or ‘active knowing’ or inspiration that I have but in which I do not know where they are (which is why I didn’t know where the guns wer at). The “toy” red gun, which I never fired, represents the thoughts that I wish I would have but never have. And so, the ‘me’ in the dream is that part of me that is frustrated. The FBI agents are that part of me questioning myself why I’m having difficulty. My fear of being arrested refers to the conflict of not being able to get out of this rut of ‘dead’ thoughts. Its like me saying to myself, “why can’t you have inspiration any more?”