Here is an account of an interesting ‘living image’ and shamanistic journey dream experiment that happened:
I was hiking and went into an area I have been before and noticed that the area was different in some way. I felt this sense of a hunt but I couldn’t pinpoint why. I could faintly feel this ‘presence’ so I focused my mind on it and began to barely make out images (as I often do on the strange phenomena I call ‘living images’ and described elsewhere in this blog). Then I closed my eyes and seemed to be removed from myself. At this point it went into a mild shamanistic journey (which I’ve also explained elsewhere in this blog).
I saw people there and they were as if in preparation for something. I asked what was going on and someone said they were going on a ‘fairy hunt’. I wondered what that was and asked to go. They said I could if I want to. I knew that it would be hard, though, as it will take a lot out of me. I decided to go . . . I must experiment and do things! And so, I went.
I asked for my boar (who is like a helper I often ride on in these dreams) and he appeared. I got on him and we began to follow the others. We had to hurry as they seemed to be up and away before I knew it. I saw them in front of me as if going into this green-bluish-black smoke. In fact, they all seemed to be the green-blue-black smoke. Occasionally, I could see them within the wisp of smoke following one another.
At first we could keep up but soon found that we could not keep up. Slowly, we fell behind. I then no longer saw them and stopped. I was lost. I found myself in a dark forest. I became frightened. Everywhere I looked for them. But the more I looked the more I seemed to see the ‘fairy hunt’, but in different ways. When I looked at a bird fly by it seemed to change and I saw them on their hunt in the wisp of smoke. When I looked at ants crawling one the ground they seemed to change and I saw them on their hunt in the wisp of smoke. When I looked at a bug fly by I saw them on their hunt in the wisp of smoke. Everywhere I looked I seemed to see the ‘fairy hunt’. I relized that, in actuality, all life was on a ‘fairy hunt’. That is to say, all creatures were on a perpetual ‘fairy hunt’. The ‘fairy hunt’ was nothing but the continual looking for life.
And then, suddenly, I saw them swoop by before me and I followed them. We tried and tried and was able to keep up, though it wasn’t easy. As we followed I looked ahead and could see the wisp of green-blue-black smoke going into what seemed like a black hole. This made me concerned as I knew I couldn’t fit in. But, sooner than I knew, I was going through the hole. It seemed to as if strip me of my skin as I went through.
I then found myself in a mass of gooey globby mass of stuff that was thick. I had to as if swim to the surface to catch a breath. I then looked around and saw that it all seemed a mass of entrails, muscle, and the insides of animals and creatures, as if in a great heap. I then felt two feelings:
- A sense of disgust and nausea.
- A ‘tingly’ sensation, like small electric shocks.
As I struggled with this I realized that I was actually in a mass of everything that was eaten by creatures. Because of this it was not the animals themselves but the part of them that was eaten: the entrails, muscle, and such. This made me even more disgusted but I began to feel that the ‘tingly’ sensation was, in actuality, a feeling of ‘life’ that is within what was eaten. That is to say, the purpose of eating is to gain the ‘life’ that is within the food. It would only make sense, then, that this gooey mass entailed a ‘life’, despite its being nauseating. It was this very life that was ‘tingly’.
As I sat there wondering about it all I noticed a big mouth up ahead. It would open and close its mouth on the continual supply of entrails and such, which I was in. I, for some reason, knew what it was. It was the ‘creature’ that represents all the creatures eating to survive. Its head looked like a salamander. Before I knew it I was looking at its mouth and I slid in. I went into its stomach, and was now constricted. I seemed to panic and fear I’d die.
Oddly, at this point, I felt this feeling for the ‘creature’. I felt a tremendous love for it. I realized that this ‘love’ was, in actuality, the ‘life’ that is within all things that sustains life. Some time later I found that, with this love, I seemed to change into the ‘creature’. In other words, the ‘life’ turned into a ‘love’ and, in so doing, I became a part of the ‘creature’. I as if became it and saw myself opening my mouth as all this gooey slippery mass went in my mouth. Then I would chomp down, open it up again, and more gooey slippery mass would go in. It seemed as if this is all the ‘creature’ did, endlessly.
With this continual feasting I could feel this horrid hunger. I wanted to eat and eat and eat. Then the hunger turned to need. I thought of all the things I needed in life. Then the need turned to want. I thought of all the things I wanted in life. Then the want turned into what I called worship. This is a sense of a great yearning for life in general, in an almost religious way. I as if saw myself kneel and raise my arms up to the sky as if to say ‘here I am’ in a worshipful way (hence the name). One could say that this is the ‘want of God’.
With this I found myself back to the place I was at . . . the hunt was over. Everyone seemed to be walking to their homes.
I opened my eyes and saw where I was at. Even though it was not deep I felt as if I had come from a great journey and the world seemed different (which I generally associate with it as being ‘deep’). I found myself saying, ” . . . that was good!”
Its interesting that the pattern of this experience went much like this:
a sense of a presence>>>>>’living image’>>>>>>shamanistic journey
To me, this is significant as it shows a relationship between all three. In other words, I see these as all variations of the same sense. The end on the left can be described as a ‘mild sense’. The end of the right is the ‘intense sense’. In many ways, it shows that the shamanistic journey is really nothing but a ‘going into’ a sense of a presence (which is exactly what it appears to me). I have always felt that this created a special relationship, the ‘presence-living image-journey association’. As I have said elsewhere I cannot develop a ‘living image’ or shamanistic journey until a ‘presence’ has been felt, showing the importance of the presence and that it is, in some respects, the beginning or sign post. With the coming of the presence I then have to follow it by focusing my mind on the presence. This focusing creates something like a ‘waking dream’. If it is mild it may appear as a ‘living image’, in which my eyes are usually open and I am awake, and I see images as if there before me. If it is deep I close my eyes and as if go into a deep meditation, in which it becomes a shamanistic journey. These are so deep I often feel as I have been removed from myself, which is something shamans all over the world have claimed.
This dream shows a natural tendency to mythology as the whole theme is mythological in context. I should point out that, as with all ‘living images’ and shamanistic journey dreams, this was not ‘made up’ by me but appeared naturally almost as a waking dream. It showed an aspect about life and nature in an interesting way that is innate and, I think, very human. As part of this mythological way that it demonstrates, it shows an explanation of the world and the relationships between everything.
To me, it seemed to describe the ‘hunger-life’ relationship in a mythological way. That is to say, it describes how we all hunger for life. To me, it showed this pattern:
In effect, this is the ‘fairy hunt’ (as it was described here) which is the hunt for life as a process, a cycle, not a ‘something’ to be gained. It is more than hunting for food or to satisfy a need. It is the hunt for life, and even more than that, the hunt for the cycle of life that is ongoing in life. I say this because there is a difference, at least to me, for the hunt for life and the hunt for the cycle of life. The hunt for life means you are seeking for something immediate and particular. This could be an object, an idea, a belief, an experience. It is usually immediate and transitory, that once you gain it the hunt ends. The hunt for the cycle of life is hunting for the ongoing endless cycle of life that never ends. The hunt, then, is for a process, not for a ‘something’ to be gained. In my opinion, this is the hardest ‘hunt’ in ones life.
It all begins with hunger, which we all feel. But there are many forms of this hunger. It appears in ways shown in the dream such as:
- The hunger for food.
- The want of something.
- A need.
- A love.
- A worshipfulness.
These are all manifestation of a various forms of hunger. One can see that the hunger has a spectrum from basic mundane material things (food) to a spirituality (worshipfulness). In this ‘hunger-life cycle’ the hunger must end with a transformation (which, then, spurns on a new hunger keeping the cycle continuing). Each hunger does this differently. Food, for example, transforms the food to energy, growth, etc. for us to use. Worshipfulness transforms a spirituality into an inner growth. The important thing to remember is that the hunger leads to transformation.
What causes this transformation is what I called ‘love’ in the dream. I used it in a special way. This ‘love’ is a sense of these things:
- An ‘openness’. In many ways, its an ‘opening up of oneself’ which requires great trust and faith for when we ‘open ourselves up’ we expose our deepest self, exposing our most tender aspect of our self. In this ‘exposing’ we allow our deepest aspects of our selves to be affected to what we expose ourselves to. In this way, a transformation is achieved for a transformation is really a ‘merging’ of us and something else as a result of ‘exposing’ of our deep tender aspect of our self.
- A yearning or longing for something. This is a reference to the desire or want of the thing to transform us. In many ways, ‘love’ is a desire for transformation, to be changed by something else.
One could say that ‘love’ is an opening up of oneself to be transformed. In the dream I was transformed by becoming the thing that ate me and this happened after I felt a love for it. That is to say, I ‘opened myself up to it’ which allowed the transformation.
The process of this hunger-love-transformation process is shown in the dream. It showed that the ‘fairy hunt’ is a continual transformation of life by seeking life. Because of this, all creatures are on the ‘fairy hunt’, as was shown when I saw that all the behavior of birds, ants, etc. were forms of the ‘fairy hunt’ itself.
An important aspect of this is that it showed a unique relationship between life and disgust/nausea. In other words, the hunger for life creates a tendency for a sense of disgust/nausea. On reflection, I was quite stunned by this but something told me that there was something important here . . . and it was important. On reflection I began to feel that disgust/nausea was a reaction to the opposite of life. In other words, disgust/nausea was a reaction to ‘life unfulfilled’ or life that is not being used but sitting stagnant (like a carcass). In that sense, its a sense of ‘waste’ that disgusts and nauseates me. As a result, when I was swimming in the gooey mass I was swimming in ‘life unfulfilled’ creating the disgust/nausea. Once it was eaten, of course, the disgust/nausea ended for the life has been used.
Copyright by Mike Michelsen